GARDENA, Calif. — Like most comedians, Erik Escobar turns his personal troubles into jokes we can all relate to.
“I’ve dealt with depression. I had anxiety issues, and comedy for me is a way to fight those things,” Escobar said.
While comedians might look like they are just winging it on stage, there’s a lot more planning that goes into it. That’s why it’s a huge rush when Escobar’s jokes land with his audience.
But, that isn’t always the case.
“Those highs are so high. It feels so amazing to get a standing ovation or an applause break. It’s the best feeling in the whole world. But on the flip side, you’re not getting those standing ovations every night,” Escobar said.
Escobar said in Los Angeles, comedians aren’t getting paid much, if at all. He said sometimes he’ll drive hours away just to make about $10 for a few minutes on stage.
That’s how passionate he and other comedians are — they are putting everything on the line, including their own problems in the hopes of getting a room full of laughs.
“Sometimes you just bomb and you just bomb. And then you leave, and then you can’t sleep that night, and you take it really personally, and you’re like, ‘What’s wrong with me? This is horrible. Should I quit standup? I hate standup. I don’t want to do this anymore,’” Escobar said.
Since Escobar entered the comedy scene, he’s lost over a dozen friends in the industry suicide.
“When they are so full of life, and they are so happy, it really hits you off guard,” Escobar said.
Ildiko Tabori is a psychologist that specializes in working with comedians. She said making a joke out of a bad situation can be therapeutic, but it’s not therapy.
“Comedians are very intelligent individuals. What happens is that when you have that level of intelligence sometimes you think you can work through your own problems,” Tabori said.
She said it’s important for comedians to talk to someone or a psychologist. Otherwise, she said it can lead to feelings of isolation.
Escobar said he uses his jokes as a way to take away someone else’s pain.
“If someone has cancer, I can make a cancer joke and give cancer less power which, is weird. It’s super weird, but it’s something that I love, and something that I could never give up,” Escobar said.
That’s why Escobar said he’ll continue to push through the quiet moments — the times where he feels disappointed in pursuit of hearing that room full laughs over and over again.