LOUISVILLE, Ky. — Addiction is known as a family disease because it affects the whole family. Regardless if a loved one is sober, it is important for family members or anyone affected by someone’s addiction to get help for themselves.

Kim Bos, who currently works at The Healing Place in Louisville, a nationally-recognized recovery program, says support and treatment for the family is crucial because the family member can become addicted to the addict, just as the addict is addicted to the substance.

“Once the addict is removed from the family situation, the family is sometimes left with this chaos inside of them,” said Bos, who previously served as the family coordinator.

Bos explained that chaos is trying to fix, manage or control the addict.

Years ago, Sandy Beckhart stood in her driveway and told her only child she couldn’t come back home because of her heroin addiction.

“You can only take so much as a human being, and I had had it. It was disrupting the whole family,” the Prospect, Ky. woman told Spectrum News 1.

That moment was a breaking point. She sought help, not for her daughter, but for herself.

That journey led her to co-found the Family Support Group at The Healing Place, along with Bos and a few other families going through the same thing. Beckhart said that group offered support that lifted a weight off of her.

“People who have not gone through it don’t understand,” Beckhart explained. “We were with parents that were going through the same thing, and so, you know, you help each other. Talk about it.”

The mission of the Family Support Group is to offer encouragement and support to those who have a friend or loved one struggling with addiction, since dealing with the disease can often leave people feeling isolated and stigmatized. Support that Bos said is crucial.

“So when the family members don’t get support themselves they are often left very anxious. They are always worried; it is hard for them to stay in the present moment,” Bos explained.

Beckhart remembers those times well, from taking her daughter’s cellphone to threatening to call the police. 

“You don’t know what to do. You do all kinds of stupid things, and then after a while you realize, you know, there’s nothing you can do about it. You have to let your child decide that it’s time for rehab,” Beckhart said.

Bos compares the control to a parent safeguarding their child against getting hurt.

“Often times, you know, that scrape on the knee is beneficial. The consequences can really encourage the person to get help,” Bos said.

A support group helps a loved one let go and focus on themselves.

“When you no longer let them stay at your house; you no longer give them money. You can always answer the phone and be loving,” Bos said.

The Healing Place’s Family Support Group is open to everyone, regardless if they know someone in recovery at the center. Bos explained the group is also an introduction to resources and support groups that offer a 12-step program. The same steps an addict goes through in recovery.

“Because just like the addict has off-the-wall behaviors, often the family does too,” Bos explained.

The Healing Center recommends Al-Anon and Nar-Anon, which have meetings across Kentucky. Al-Anon is a support group for anyone worried about someone’s drinking, while Nar-Anon is for friends and families of addicts, regardless of the substance.

Other Kentucky support groups are listed below. Therapy also offers one-on-one support.

While every support group is different, they are the same in that each one offers anonymity and a non-judgmental environment to help remove the isolation and stigma that people often feel. Beckhart encourages those interested to try difffrent ones until they find the right fit. For her, that meant starting one.

“You have to find a group that you feel comfortable in, and I went to a couple of different ones, and I never felt like I fit in. So you have to try different groups, and you’ll find one where you fit in,” she explained.

Beckhart’s daughter is sober and doing well, but Beckhart continues to be involved with The Healing Place’s Family Support Group because she knows a lot of parents whose kids are still suffering from addiction.

“A lot of people do it alone, but I think with all of the support groups out there that don’t cost anything…I know a lot of people, once they’re involved with them, it’s like their life saver,” Beckhart said.

Kentucky Support Groups

*All meetings are free. Some ask for a donation, but there is no obligation to give.

  • The Healing Place’s Family Support Group (Louisville) meets the first Tuesday of every month at 6:30 p.m. at The Healing Place’s Men’s Campus (1020 W. Market in downtown Louisville). For more information, call The Healing Place Family Coordinator, Samantha Goodwin, at 502-585-4848 ext. 608 or email samantha.goodwin@thehealingplace.org. The group is open to everyone, regardless if they know someone in recovery at the center.
  • Al-Anon (meetings across Kentucky) – A 12-step support group for anyone worried someone with a drinking problem. There’s also Ala-Teen, a support group specifically for adolescents. Find a meeting here.
  • Nar-Anon (meetings across Kentucky) – A 12-step support group for families and friends of addicts, regardless of the substance. Find a meeting here.
  • SMART Recovery Family & Friends (Lexington, Nicholasville, Somerset, and Hazard, Ky., plus meetings in the Cincinnati area) – Offers something different, as it's not a 12-step program. The tools and resources provided and used in the meetings are based on cognitive therapy. Find a meeting here.