The production of Columbinus that was set to open last weekend ends with a projection – a list of every mass shooting in the U.S. since Columbine. 

Josh Clabaugh had the job of typing in all those places. 

“It just became numbing that you were typing name after name after name after name,” he said.

And now…another name to add to the list: Thousand Oaks.

For months director Brett Elliott has been leading the cast of eight students as they put themselves in the shoes of the classmates and parents of the victims, and the shooters themselves. 

The cast was wrapping up their final dress rehearsal last Wednesday when their phones started buzzing.

“I feel punched in the gut,” Elliott told us, just hours after the shooting. 

“My heart is breaking for my cast. They were sitting here working for months now trying to understand and experience what it’s like to be the victim of an event like this and I would never wish it upon them to know first-hand.”

The decision to cancel opening night – along with the rest of the performances last weekend -- was made quickly. But at the time, many involved thought it was important that the show go on – at some point.  

“It was always that it can’t happen here, until it happened….here,” said cast member Clayton Currie.

Victoria Karr, whose childhood friend lost her fiancé in the shooting, added “I understand if people don’t want to see it but people need to see it.”

During a conversation Thursday morning, Elliott pointed out some eerie similarities, “They said that this guy was wearing a black trench coat. Tell me this play isn’t relevant.  Tell me this play doesn’t have something to teach us. It absolutely does.”

After nearly a week of discussions, the decision was finally made to cancel all performances. However Elliott says one special performance will be held for an invite-only audience. This issue, he says, is the threat of our time, and theater is the place to shine a glaring spotlight on it.

“It’s a place to look the ugliness right in the face, he explains. “You have to engage with it, try to make sense of it, hold it up to the light and shake it a little bit and if we don’t go forward it’s a lost opportunity to do that.”